Wednesday, December 12, 2012

Reading People

आचारः कुलमाख्याति देशमाख्याति भाषणम्
सम्भ्रमः स्नेहमाख्याति वपुराख्याति भोजनम्
- चाणक्य नीति


Aachaara-ha kulam-aakhyaati desham-aakhyaati bhaaShaNam
Sambhrama-ha sneham-aakhyaati vapuraakhyaati bhojanam


Meaning: (One's) conduct (aachara) speaks about his family or ancestry (kula); speech (bhaaShaNa) reveals his land (desha); excitement communicates affection (sneha); physical form proclaims food traits.

This shloka teaches us how to read different aspects of people around us, and even our own selves. Let's start from the food part. The shape of our body is the best indicator of our food habits. The rounder we are...   :-)

Excitement, exhilaration and enthusiasm in someone's body language show that you are very affectionate to them, while a withdrawn, reserved behavior usually portrays the opposite. When we like someone, it just shows! And that, I think, is the best way to create a bonding relationship with anyone
just like them genuinely. No front-smile and back-bite ! The words we speak do not matter too much, but genuine love within, always speaks more for us.

Our speech gives away our native lands. In India, and around the world, each region has its own dialect. A person speaking Marathi or Gujarati will not only be identified to Maharashtra or Gujarat, but also to the particular town or region within those states. Same with different parts of the world! English as spoken in America is different from Britain or Australia.

And our conduct reveals a lot about our lineage, our ancestry. Perhaps the most important of all
what we do and how we do, are indicators to our lineage. Society makes judgments about our ancestors and our parents based on their observation of our behavior. Each dynasty, each clan, each kula, each family lineage stood for some values. This was in olden days, which now exists only in a fractured form. People of a certain family adhered to a certain conduct, a certain aachar. That is called as aachar-samhita. They are not rules, but if we believe ourselves to be of a certain family, of a certain Parivar, if we are of a common Father, then we would adhere to that code of conduct. This feeling places a lot of responsibility on my shoulders. If I am not of good conduct, then my Father gets vilified. Conversely, my virtuous conduct automatically brings accolades to my Father, to my family, and to my clan.

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